Saturday, July 19, 2008

Guest Blog

How excited I am to be a guest on Lorries Blog, since I have just butted my way into her life whether she wanted to LOVE ME or not! This could be the equivalent of Ed McMahon ringing my doorbell !

I found her accidentally and am a total fan and share her weekend wine wisdom with my friends here in Dallas, the Original Chicks ("HEY to the girlz"). I don't really know where Lorries fans are located, but I'm sure she is INTERNATIONAL by now (since receiving the Arte Y Pico De Gallo award~!) BUT why I am saying that is the usual perception of people in Texas is that we all are rednecks, have big hair, and drive pickups. Well, we do not ALL drive pickups. Unless we need to bring something really BIG home. Like a longhorn steer to put in the back know, for the kids to play with. Then for a barbeque before they get too attached.

This blog disease I've contracted actually started over dinner one night with the Chicks when someone brought the subject up of actually making $$$ doing this! We laughed and said we should start a blog, so since I do everything I'm told, I now ramble and write to them with no apparent direction or particular subject. Trouble is, I'm computer challenged so it shows up to them as an email, and I told them I like it that way because I'm like the weird estranged brother in law that just shows up in your inbox. Don't act like you are not at home. I can hear the TV.....

I have THREE dogs, which I call the sled team, and my dog blog is Tales from the House of Tail. The Scottie, Abner, is the smallest and self appointed security. He is 22 pounds of Bad to the Bone, as in, the meter reader fears him, and I like it that way. Bella, a Lab mix that looks like a dingo, was obtained in a parking lot under a free puppy sign, and bless her heart, she is challenged. I seem to hear the Rolling Stones singing 'get a girl with far away eyes' when I look at her. And the latest addition is a full blood Basset named Owen, who truly wandered into my life and we rescued each other. He has a secret to tell me but I haven't decoded it yet. So I just get those soulful eyes in the mean time. Last but not least, we live in a house the size of an AMC Pacer, so we are CLOSE, as in tripping over each other. I'm thinking about drinking my Chardonnay from a sippy cup soon.

I own and feed Attachedatthehiponlychild. She is a dream come true, and even though she thinks my ATM card is part of my arm, she is worth every penny. She is truly a Chick in Training~ the shopping/spending DNA has pretty good taste, so I'm hoping to be fortunate and not fight the weird hair, piercings, or boyfriends named Skater Boy. I know I am just twisted enough that I will be able to run off Skater Boy with ease, precision and probably alot of pleasure, and then place her in my own version of the witness protection program. I am that "Muther."

I love all types of music, and told Lorrie my rating system for a good song on the radio is whether or not it makes me want to open my sunroof. Lately, that is also a choice whether or not you want to melt your mascara because we are pretty much hovering around 100 degrees everyday in Dallas. August is even hotter, so if you are now saying "yall are crazy to live there", I'm running around in shorts in February while other far away lands are shoveling that white frozen shit that makes us crash into each other down here. Snow and Texas do not go together in so many ways.........Our kids make great DIRT ANGELS though, and that can be a year round sport!
(That sounds pretty redneck doesn't it? OK, go ahead and plug in the bug zapper. )

This was fun and I now will be forced to get my first tatoo to mark the occasion. I'll probably sign off and then think, oh I wish I'd said this or I wish I'd said that but maybe I'll be back to write again. If not, I'll just show up, and don't act like you aren't home. I see some lights on in there............

Bj in Dallas


Grace P. Glover said...

Hi BJ,
Reading your guest blog this morning was fun and I feel very special because now I know someone famous and you are just the type of Chick to expand her 15 minutes of fame into an full-blown blog career. Please don't forget about the little people, though. We knew you before you were (in)famous.

Now back to my uber-boring Inbox. Maybe I will find another gem from you...

Chick Prez

sheila smith said...

Hi BJ -- I personally like it when you arrive unannounced in my inbox. I usually have wine waiting...
Great job!!


lazee said...

too funny- sounds hot in TEXAS! hope to see you again here

Susan Mc said...

Love it. You are way too funny. You must come from a family that has great genes to be so witty!

Your sister Susan

chris said...

As the husband of a Chick, it is great to see one of you actually putting some thoughts on 'paper'.

We usually just get to hear snippets at HQ, or around a beer cooler at one of the Chick and other half gatherings.

Great job,