Tuesday, September 02, 2008
Not on The List
Today was The Bananna and Complicated Boy's FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL (Can I get an AMEN to that...and shall we now Gather at the River for a cocktail or two, because Fall Drinking Hours officially begin at 9 am now.) Bananna started Kindergarten and CBoy began his maiden voyage as a Second Grader. Both kids had long lists of school supplies that we needed to provide on day one, and we dutifully fulfilled all requests--even the Teacher's "Wish List" because there's nothing we like better than starting off a new year by being a Kiss Ass. One can always hope that future transgressions in Math and Reading will be offset by that jumbo box of Clorox Wipes we so generously provided on September 2nd.
The big change this year is that I am no longer allowed to accompany Cboy to his classroom door, where traditionally we would part like two people in a Lifetime Television movie; in which one character is going off to war and the other is dying of leukemia. Ordinarily, I add an extra ten minutes into the whole process so that after we stop embracing, he can stand at the classroom doorway, wistfully watching me walk away and down the hall, stopping to say "I love you" in sign language every two feet by pointing to my eye, my heart, and then him. Apologies to those of you who at this point have thrown up a little in your own mouths. I feel it is my duty to provide CBoy with enough material for the analyst's couch. I take this job very seriously.
So finding out that he would have to go TO THE THIRD FLOOR ALL BY HIMSELF kind of threw a wrench into everything, and with all the commotion and hubub that is involved in the first day, I handed him what I thought were two bags full of goodies from Staples.
I wonder what his teacher is going to think when she opens them up and discovers a full week of lunches from Jenny Craig.