If, like me, you are a big fan of www.soulmoxie.com you'll know she just recently had a house party tour. TO WHICH SHE DID NOT INVITE ME. Which is Just Not Right, seeing as I would have been the one to spill the red wine on the white carpets and spend an hour snooping in her medicine cabinets. Anyhoo, my favorite Drew Barrymore look-alike (she does, doesn't she?) has a LOVELY house with lots of beautiful distressed wood. My house is just plain distressed. So let's have a party of our own, shall we? An impromptu thing--like you just arrived at the door with a keg, a box of wine and a package of frozen cocktail weiners. And you are not A BIT surprised that the place is a mess.
So here we are in the yard. This is where we keep our bikes, our baby carriages, our blow up Elmo dolls and the small ponies that are so necessary to life in New York City.
Which way should we go?
I think we will have to go for "HOME" seeing as "The Bear Cave" is a euphamism for second bathroom that we would like to encourage Sexyhusbandomine to use for his "Sit-Downs."
So here were are in the ENTRANCE.
And as you can see we have a breathtaking view. I know you guys are used to seeing swanky NYC digs on television and in movies, but the truth is most one bedrooms come with a rooster.
If for no other reason than to keep the horses company.
Now, let's go into the kitchen.
My only words of advice being that you shouldn't drink and mural. Here's more of the kitchen.
Isn't it handy the way the kitchen table doubles as a desk for Sexyhusbandomine? New Yorkers are totally resourceful like that. Most of the time he puts that computer away when we eat at the table. Sometimes he doesn't, and I sit across from him and it's like a scene in the old Get Smart tv show where they lower the cone of silence.
This is how I manage my life as a Mompreneur.
Every smiley face equals one dollar. Bananna is thrifty and has been saving for a motorized Barbie dream car (which we will have to fit in that front hall) but CBoy spends his allowance each week. This past week he blew the whole wad on a set of plastic teeth painted gold. Because HE ABSOLUTELY NEEDED THAT GRILLE. Sadly, they made him gag each time he tried to wear them, so we feel a valuable financial lesson was learned. Next week I am sending that boy into town with our cow.
Here's a shot of our living room.
That danish coffee table with the Sharpie Marker all over it is symbolic of our transition from new parents to the seasoned veterans that we are now. It was a big day in our house when we allowed sharp corners to re-enter our lives.
Here's two of my favorite pieces of artwork
My orange horses head and
A portrait of Sexyhusbandomine's father: DeeDadalicious. First of all, let me say that we are the ONLY ones who have this picture hanging in our home which we think should clearly have some weight when he drafts his will--me being the GOOD Daughter-In-Law and all. Secondly, let me add that the challenge in hanging this portrait was that the greatest available wall space was in our bedroom and while I love DeeDadlicious, no one wants Judge Wapner announcing any verdicts in their boudoir. Speaking of which...
There was a time we collected fine leatherbound editions with pages edged in gold. Now we have multiple copies of Goodnight Moon. Note that in order to reach the bed, you must TURN SIDEWAYS. Hence the recent decision to join Jenny Craig. This room also has other bedroom essentials not pictured: dressers, closets, fur lined handcuffs, etc.
I cannot show you The Spawn's rooms because there are signs on them that say things like KEEEEEP OT and NO TRISPAZNG and because the sheer magnitude of things like The Egyptian Collection and The Stuffed Animal Collection are blogworthy in themselves, so we will start winding up the tour here--in the powder room.
And here you have the only hardship of city life; sharing this small bathroom with FIVE PEOPLE: Me, CBoy, Bananna, Sexyhusbandomine, and Sexyhusbandomine's colon.
This concludes today's tour of Chez Veasey. We've enjoyed having you, and hope you won't mind taking out the garbage on your way out.