Monday, June 29, 2009


Dear Spawn,

ABC as easy as 1,2,3 as simple as Do Re Mi, there are many lessons to be learned from the life and death of Mr. Michael Jackson:

I'M TALKING TO THE MAN IN THE MIRROR. You were given a face. It's a nice one. Please don't change it. I hope that you will grow up and learn to love yourself exactly the way that you are.

IT'S BLACK IT'S WHITE. Life doesn't have to be lived off the wall. Try to find the grey area--often you will find that's where happiness lives. Don't create drama for the sake of creating drama.

THAT GIRL IS MINE. Value true friendships over any amount of money. A business decision will not visit you when you are sick, or lift you up when you are sad. Do the right thing; your friends might be the WINGS above your wind.

CAUSE THIS IS THRILLER. Celebrities are people who have interesting jobs. The fact that they have interesting jobs does not make them good, smart, or decent human beings. Often celebrities are extremely damaged in every other area of their life. Admire and appreciate their talents, but know that they can be very flawed people with screwed up lives. Save your hero worship for yourself.

I'M BAD. One glove in the wintertime is NEVER stylish. Take care of your things.

THE WAY YOU MAKE ME FEEL. Listen to what my friends have to say in the comment section below.

Love, Mommy


KLS said...


Rachel@just another day in paradise said...

sometimes it's the wierd ones that you miss the most when they're gone. At the very least, you notice they're gone way more.

PS Don't dangle children out windows. No matter what.

Debbie said...

Poor Michael. I spent many a happy teenage hour listening to his albums (vinyl!) and then many a happy 20-something time watching his videos. He had incredible talent. And sadness and tragedy. Yes, I would hope for my children the wisdom you have conveyed in this post.

OHN said...

I think an open letter to our children about hero worship should be mandatory. Personally, I would like my husband to be worshiped and paid like a celebrity for actually saving lives, not pretending to on TV.

I hear that his children will be living with his parents, the ones that were abusive to Michael and his siblings...HELLO? I sure hope these kids can outrun them like Michael said he could.

Jen said...

You know Lorrie, I wish you were my mom.

Kr√ęg said...

DON'T STOP TILL YOU GET ENOUGH. Actually, that' horrible advice. Stop well before you've had enough. Moderation in all things. Not stopping until you get enough leads to fatness, addiction, and overbearing attitudes. And no one loves a fat, crackhead a$$hole.

Nice use of Off The Wall, by the way.

Miss Thystle said...

Billy Jean was not my lover. Not that there is anything wrong with same sex love.

In fact, love is the most beautiful, terrible thing in the world. Right now, a whole lot of people are trying to say who it's okay to love and who it's not. It's not their business. It's not up to anyone else who you love. If you are lucky enough to find love, hold it close and fight for it.

It's worth it.

kwr221 said...

Waaaah, he was SO cute when he was younger! :-(

rpc said...

Excellent advice! You could also tell them not to go for 10 days without updating their blogs, leaving their poor readers bereft.

Spatula said...

Good music. Bad person. Tragedy, but also the maker of tragedies for others, and a doer of unforgivable things.

Excellent advice. Also: when someone in power is being really, really, really nice to you for no reason, RUN.

The Fabulous Sheree Burlington said...

I'll miss his incredible genius. He gave us more than entertainment. His was a lesson on how not to live a life.

PS: I'm with rpc.

Bj in Dallas said...

Its so weird to see how freaky people are about his death, much like Elvis. No wonder he was screwed up, his life was nothing we would ever understand. And this is true, I just went on EVITE to send out a little HH invite to my girls, and there is an invitation for a MJ Memorial Party! No shit.

LV- you missed GOT TO BE THERE.
meaning, don't stay MIA so long or we will hunt you down. :)

Jane! said...

And then there's that whole white socks/black pants fashion violation.

Undoubtedly the BEST Post-MJ post I've read.

Michelle (mkc photography) said...

Simultaneously funny and sadly true - Jane, my husband still violates the white socks/black pants thing. *sigh*

Sweet CuddleCakes said...

Being that I didn't know Michael Jackson personally, I think it a bit sad that he is being judged based on what the media has told us as opposed to who we really was. Who knows? He may have been all that the media said and then some, but because I have never spoken to him face to face in regards to his parents, his life, or what may have cause him to be bruised mentally, I am just grateful that he shared his great talent with the world. Rest in peace, MJ.

Amy said...

I work at a day care and on the Monday after MJ died on of the kids said to me " I had no clue Michael Jackson was black till I saw a picture of him as a kid"