Tuesday, October 13, 2009



If you want a blog, you will just have to get in line behind The Spawn who are crying for annoying things like food and clean clothes, my boss who is really putting me out by asking for work, Sexyhusbandomine who thinks I should be able to remember his name and stop referring to him as "He who Must Do The Grocery Shopping" , and the cats...omg...has anyone seen the cats lately?

Because I have a sickness. A terrible sickness. I am compelled to VOLUNTEER. I. Cannot. Say. No.

If you were to organize an intervention it would be swell, but I may not be able to attend because I HAVE TO MAKE CUPCAKES.

I am currently working on a BIG EVENT for The Spawn's school that will happen this Saturday, October 17th and involves bouncey castles, arts & crafts, games, magic shows, face painting, a crafts fair & A PETTING ZOO.

Right now I am walking the tightrope between feeling wonderfully excited and fearing that the whole event will be a Disaster of Huge Proportions. Should my head explode at some point, I hope someone will mention in my eulogy how very nice my posters were, and how they always had sparkly shiny glitter.

When I come back next week (yes, i said next week. Unless someone wants to VOLUNTEER a guest blog. I WILL! I WILL! wait..what was I saying?) I will write about Blue's visit, about Deb's fabulous and tasty card, and how I sent Kreg on to other people. Stay Tuned Chickens.


Miss Thystle said...

unacceptable! The Spawn know how to use the phone, there's a deli on the corner that delivers. Send out the laundry (you're helping the economy) and cats will not let themselves starve if there is furniture to eat.

Problem solved!

Kr√ęg said...

Hey, any time you need a tastelessly offensive guest blog, just let me know. Or if you need something more PG-13, I suppose I could always try to censor myself.

Heh heh. In fact, I think I'll go 'censor' myself right now. Where's my lube....?

WV: audoop
The goofy Frenchman bid me audoop.

jodi said...

I'm glad to see I'm not the only one with type of sickness. I just agreed to be a girl scout leader for my youngest daughter. Oh and btw, I'm already my older daughter's leader too.

Jen said...

We'll all be here waiting for you. With wine, of course.

ZDub said...

Now listen, just because Kreg and I go way back does NOT mean you can not send him to Colorado.

Get with the program, Lorrie. You can blog between the hours of 3 a.m. and 5 a.m.

I'm hearing a lot of excuses. :)

Metalicious said...

Hang in there Lorrie!!! We will always love you.

Lo said...

Lorrie, pack Kreg carefully. We do NOT want to see him get hurt. And as for PTA-type activities, I think that's the cure for teen pregnancy. Warn children early and often that if they dally, they'll have to organize school events. That's enough to cool anyone's ardor.

Bj in Dallas said...

here's my tip.

Petting Zoo = Hand Sanitizer.

you're welcome

Sheila said...

I was going to write a very clever comment, as I do. But I just now noticed that Kreg's face is on the Statue of Liberty. And all other thoughts have left my head.

And I second BJ's comment: petting zoo's are like a rave for e. coli & other funky germs...

WV: veike
Veike is what comes out of your nose after you pet that dodgy lamb at the petting zoo & don't use hand santizer.

EtsyFoodSnob said...

Just wanted to say that reading your 'about me' section brought tears of absolute awesomeness to my eyes - I cannot wait to catch up on past blog posts and look forward to new ones, your writing style is refreshing and quite amusing. Thank you!

le @ whoopwhoop said...

hello dear one - hope all the kiddie stuff went to plan ... you are one AMAZING chickadee yourself MS LV .... best le

WV : promlves - the problems you have at 3am after a bottle and a half of chardy the cardy-board ...

Bj in Dallas said...

chardy the cardy-board? sounds like she already had one.



the dance you do after a cardy of chardy

kwr221 said...

Lorri - I love you! This was just what I needed to jumpstart my blog and unleash a torrent of ideas that have been festering in my head,

Already Kreg has ridden with me to pick up my son from football (he wore his seatbelt), helped make spaghetti, and later tonight, we're going in the hot tub!

I am concerned however, that he will need a shower and a change of clothes before he goes to visit the next person.

And does he have his tickets already? I'm not sure where he'll go when he leaves here.

Jane! said...

I REALLY hope you used hand sanitizer before you sent out your mail/male.

obat kuat herbal jamu tradisional said...

obat kuat , obat kuat herbal , jamu , tradisional , 100 % alami, mengatasi impotensi, tahan lama