Real things The Spawn said this week:
ME: What are you doing getting a juice box out of the fridge before dinner? You know we don't have juice before dinner.
BANANA: It's not juice mom. It's a cocktail.
ME: Why won't you eat your Falafel?
CBOY: Because you said it was made from chicken pee, and I don't eat chicken pee.
Speaking of childen, on another google image troll for work I found a series of these signs:
Now...where did I put those children.....